


Tangled Tentacles

by imogene_lovelace



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: Crack, Humor, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-05-15
Updated: 2007-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 03:27:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29128737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imogene_lovelace/pseuds/imogene_lovelace
Summary: Cephalopods get lonely too.  HP/POTC crossover.
Relationships: Giant Squid (Harry Potter)/Kraken
Kudos: 1





	Tangled Tentacles

Something strange was definitely going on in the lake. 

There would be waves at odd times when Harry walked by, even on calm days. And occasionally he would see a tentacle that didn't look quite like it belonged to the giant squid. 

When he and Ron asked Hagrid about it, he looked nervous, offered them something inedible, and tried to change the subject. It wasn't until Ron threatened to steal some gillyweed and look for himself that Hagrid admitted the lake had a new resident. 

"You know how Sirius was on vacation for a while, down in the tropics, right?" 

Harry and Ron nodded. 

"Well, apparently he took up scuba diving and met some old sea monster they call a kraken. Used to terrorize boats and such all over the ocean back a couple hundred years or so ago, but lately he's jus' been hangin' around Bermuda grabbing the occasional airplane out o' the sky. Sirius thought he was moping so 'cause he was lonely, so he apparates with the thing right here into the middle of the lake. Thought he might like the company. And, well, he an' the squid have been gettin' on real good." Hagrid suddenly looked embarrassed and stared at his shoes. 

**********

His new paramour had so many good stories, thought the giant squid. He himself had done some traveling back when he was younger, banged around the odd submarine or two, but life had been pretty dull since he'd retired to this lake. Some pleasurable company was just what he'd been wanting. 

The latest installment of cephalopod pillow-talk was all about a man who'd locked his heart in a box and taken to the sea so that he'd turned half into a squid himself. The kraken had been so intrigued with him that he'd agreed to destroy any ships the squid-man didn't like, until one fateful day when he swallowed a pirate who didn't die. The kraken spit him out to keep him from poking his insides so much, and then this pirate, who nanced about a lot but was rather clever, had a fight with the squid-man and killed him. After that the kraken decided he was done interfering in the affairs of men and mostly kept to the bottom of the sea. 

When the story was done, the kraken and the giant squid tangled their tentacles together and went to sleep.


End file.
